Today I’ll be sharing the single most powerful personality trait that helps to attract beautiful women. And how to develop it in just 10 minutes a day.
Yes, you’ll be pleased to know that you don’t have to be rich, famous or hung like a horse to attract quality women. And when it comes to looks, women are a much more forgiving than men.
Everyone knows at least one guy who is neither loaded nor especially good looking, yet who has no problem attracting women. And you might even know of an arrogant jerk who doesn’t treat women well, yet for some mysterious reason women are attracted to him like moths to a flame. Maybe you’ve wondered how could they possibly be so naive?
How Self-Esteem Affects Your Social Status
Here’s the thing, women are attracted to men who demonstrate high status through a number of specific personality and behavioral traits. Your social status has everything to do with how you behave around other people, how other people behave around you, and how you treat yourself.
In fact, how you treat yourself is the most important because it directly influences how you behave around other people and how they behave around you.
So one of the most important traits to becoming an attractive man is a strong sense of self-belief. This means being a man who likes himself, trusts himself and is confident in his ability to get things done.
Central to this mindset is a set of beliefs about how others should treat you and what you’re rightfully entitled to in this world. These beliefs will empower you to behave in a way that’s attractive to women and to be successful in life.
It also goes a long way to explain why some arrogant guys have no problem attracting women purely due to their inflated self-confidence. Of course women don’t go out of their way to date jerks and they’ll usually see a man for what he is sooner or later, but it’s undeniable that confidence attracts.
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How You See Yourself Influences Others
The point I’m making here is that your beliefs shape your behaviors and your behaviors shape how others perceive and treat you.
If you don’t believe that you’re worthy of a beautiful girlfriend then attracting one will be “mission impossible” because you’ll behave in a way that communicates neediness, inferiority or inadequacy — qualities that repulse women.
On the other hand, if you’re convinced that you’re a great catch with a lot to offer any girl, regardless of how beautiful, then you’ll convey this in your behavior. Women will pick up on it and find you attractive. It might sound hard to believe, but it’s absolutely true.
But if you don’t value and respect yourself, how can you expect other people to love you? It’s easy for women to filter out men with low self-esteem if your behavior is saying, “I’m not so important, so don’t bother treating me well.”
Faking Self-Esteem is a Band-Aid Solution
The pick up artist community tends to band-aid the problem by teaching ways to mislead women into thinking you’re high status and confident, when the real solution is to be high status and confident.
Women aren’t stupid. In fact they’re experts at sizing men up, so faking it is not a long term solution. Sure if you’re very lucky you might get laid, but you’ll never be able to maintain long term relationships with quality women without genuine confidence and self-belief.
Real confidence means worrying less about other people’s perception of you than in your perception of yourself. It means being content with your life and proud of who you are.
Real confidence allows you to show interest in women without appearing needy and without acting phony or fake because you figure that if a woman doesn’t appreciate you for who you are, then it’s her loss and you’re better off without her.
Real confidence turns you into a man with options. A non-needy, high status man whom women love to be around. Real confidence makes women become more highly invested in you than you are in them because you have the “je ne sais quoi” that women are looking for in a man.
So, how can you get rid of your hang-ups and limiting beliefs and become more confident?
Nobody Expects You to Be Perfect
Well firstly it’s helpful to remember that nobody is perfect and everyone has their own set of issues, including the most beautiful women in the world. We all have our weaknesses, embarrassments and vulnerabilities so you’re certainly not unique in that regard.
Your goal should be to become the best possible version of yourself. It’s not about eliminating your flaws completely, but more about accepting yourself unconditionally and striving to be as good as you can be by setting high standards for yourself and believing that you can improve.
If you’re confident enough to express yourself freely and have the strength of character to expose your imperfections without worrying what other people think, then you’ll come across as non-needy and therefore high status and attractive to women.
What’s Holding You Back?
When we worry too much what other people think of us, we cripple ourselves with insecurity. We start judging ourselves based on other peoples’ reactions to us. Perhaps you’ve been teased or even bullied in the past and this has resulted in deep-seated limiting beliefs about yourself, what you’re capable of achieving or who you’re capable of attracting.
If this is the case, bear in mind that often people say things that they don’t really mean, or at least they don’t expect their words to have the scarring effect that they do. And people who do intend to do you emotional harm, usually have enough issues and hang-ups of their own that you needn’t waste your time worrying about their opinion of you.
Or maybe you were rejected by a girl you really liked and you’ve allowed that to negatively influence your self-belief. Perhaps that experience has made you feel nervous and uncomfortable around women you’re attracted to. It’s easy to forget that rejection is a part of life and that nobody is rejection proof.
In fact rejection can even be a good thing, particularly if you learn to think of it as “feedback” rather than rejection. This will help you to learn from mistakes to become a more attractive man.
But rejection can be good in other ways because it can keep people apart who aren’t good for each other. Rejection can help you sift through the women who are not good for you and get to the ones who will appreciate you for the person you are, that much quicker.
Sometimes our parents carry some of the blame because we were raised in a way such as not to express our emotions freely. So we’ve become stifled and bottled up because we’re worried about being too controversial, unique, crazy, stupid or even selfish.
What it boils down to is that your opinion of yourself is the only opinion that really matters because how you see yourself shapes your reality. The trick is to develop your positive personality traits so they outweigh negativity and self-doubt.
Take Responsibility for Your “Inner Game”
Irrelevant of who or what you think is to blame for your insecurities, it’s vital that from today you stop making excuses for your situation and take responsibility for your life. It’s called self–esteem for a reason, because it’s how you regard yourself, which is a decision entirely up to you.
Don’t give someone the satisfaction of watching you suffer because the best revenge is moving on and getting over it. Remember since you are the most important person in your life, you can act that way for no special reason. This focus on taking responsibility for your self-esteem and developing a positive mindset is what attraction experts call mastering your “inner game”.
Unless you take responsibility to program your own mind, the world will program it for you. Take responsibility to program your own mind with positive affirmations to become a better and more confident version of yourself.
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Improve Self-Esteem With Positive Affirmations
So what are positive affirmations and how can you use them to increase your confidence with women?
Affirmations are nothing more than focused and specific statements about yourself that act positively on your subconscious mind. Over time they affect your self-image, confidence and beliefs. Writing and repeating affirmations is a great way of counteracting the negative influences that other people, the media, and society have on your self-esteem and belief system.
Affirmations should be based on how you picture your ideal self and they should make you feel good emotionally. Affirmations are only effective if they’re in the present tense and avoid negative words. So instead of saying “I don’t get rejected”, a more effective affirmation would be “Beautiful women are attracted to me.”
People are very quick to write off affirmations as hocus-pocus nonsense, but I have absolutely no doubt that they work. Here are some example affirmations that you could use to help you to become the kind of man that women are looking for. Feel free to reuse the ones that you like or edit them to make them more meaningful to you.
Positive Affirmations for Self-Esteem:
- I love and respect myself and I feel empowered around women.
- My life is interesting and I live my life with purpose and passion.
- I have everything I need to be happy and optimistic about the future.
- I am confident, calm, relaxed and emotionally strong.
- I am charming, intriguing and charismatic and women are naturally attracted to me.
- I feel grounded and comfortable in my own skin.
- I am challenging, playful and fun and I make women smile easily.
- I am decisive and feel comfortable taking responsibility and leading interactions with women.
- I am sociable and I meet fun, positive people.
- I am a good listener and easy to talk to.
- I have interesting ideas to contribute to conversation and I make my opinions known.
- I am honest and respectful in my dealings with others and treat people as I’d like to be treated.
- I attract women with my own unique style and personality.
- I know that rejection is only feedback that helps me to improve my skills with women.
- I have healthy sexual desires and I’m comfortable with my sexuality.
- I communicate my feelings and desires openly and non-apologetically.
- I am always in the right place at the right time, meeting the right people and being offered the best opportunities.
- I live in a world of abundance with many beautiful and fun-loving women.
- I know that everything will be okay in the end, and if it’s not okay, it’s not the end.
- I know that the happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything.
- I live my life on my own terms. I am proud of who I am and I refuse to be anyone else.
- I am in control of my life and I shape my own reality.
- I walk with my shoulders back, head up, stomach in and I look people in the eye, proud of who I am.
I suggest writing your affirmations in a note app on your phone so you always have them with you. Another great idea is to record yourself reading them and listen to that recording when you wake up in the morning, during your morning commute or before bed.
Transform Your Life in 10 Minutes a Day
It only takes 10 minutes a day to read your affirmations to yourself out loud. The more you repeat them, the deeper they’ll sink into your sub-conscious mind, and the more transformational they’ll be. Try to visualize yourself while you say your affirmations and say it like you mean it.
Remember, this isn’t about being in a state of denial about your weaknesses. In fact, people are attracted to each others rough edges because it’s what makes us human. Use these affirmations to increase your self-esteem and confidence in women despite your imperfections.
With time they will help you to overcome challenges, seize opportunities and become a better, stronger and more attractive man. Remember that you control the movie of your life and you decide the role you’re going to play. Everyone else is just a guest in your reality.
It might seem weird at first, but for the next two weeks commit 10 minutes a day to test these affirmations yourself. I’m confident that you’ll notice positive changes in the way you feel about yourself and the way you interact with others. Do this for two years and you can literally transform your life!
Look, I know that 99% of the guys who read this post will think that positive affirmations are lame or they will be too lazy to take action. But if you don’t change your habits, you can’t expect to change the results you’ve been getting in your life. Like with a fitness program, habit is destiny. First shape your habits and then they’ll shape you.
If you found this helpful and you’re part of that 1% of guys who is prepared to take action, then please leave a comment below.
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