Flirting and creating sexual chemistry is a skill that few men ever master, which is a real shame considering how much women love a man who can flirt.
Flirting is about expressing your sexuality to women, subtly or overtly, but always in a confident and non-needy way to increase a woman’s attraction to you.
If you want to learn how to flirt with women and you’re tired of the same old flirting tips for guys like make eye contact, smile, compliment her… blah, blah, blah… then these flirting tips for guys will be a welcome breath of fresh air.
Avoid Hairdresser Conversation
Unfortunately what many guys consider to be flirting can be best described as hairdresser conversation. This is when guys bombard girls with tired questions that do nothing to express sexuality like “What is your name?” “Where are you from?” “What do you do for a living?” etc.
The key to flirting successfully is understanding that women are attracted to men who make them feel safe, secure and excited at the same time. Hairdresser conversation is boring and does nothing to demonstrate the high-status behavioral traits that women are looking for in a man or set you apart from all the other guys she meets.
Attract beautiful girls without acting fake,
following a complicated system, or being creepy!
Click Here for my Free Seduction eCourse
No More Mr. Nice Guy
Another huge flirting mistake, especially common among shy guys who are too nervous to demonstrate sexual interest, is simply being “nice” to women in the hope that you’ll be rewarded sexually for kind words, thoughtfulness and agreeability. Guys who take this approach try to win the affection of women by doing favors, offering emotional support and being especially considerate and non-confrontational.
While it’s a good way to make female friends who enjoy having their ego stroked and being treated like princesses, it sure won’t get you laid. (If this sounds like you, then check out my article on avoiding the Friend Zone, because that’s where you’ll be heading.)
The sad irony is that nice guys are so worried about not making a bad impression that the play it too safe and end up making a bland, forgettable and replaceable impression, which when it comes to attraction is probably the worst impression of all.
Nice guys make the mistake of thinking that they can somehow sneak in “under the radar” without putting sexual pressure on a girl. They fail to realize that women actually want a man who is comfortable expressing his sexuality. In fact, nice guys risk being labelled “manipulative” or “spineless” for not making their real intentions clear.
Don’t forget that women instinctively want a man who can protect her. How safe would you feel around someone who ran around doing everything you wanted of them? Nice guy submissive and non-assertive behavior leads women to assume that if you can’t stand up for yourself, what are the chances of you taking a stand for her.
Let the words “No More Mr. Nice Guy” carry you forward from this point on as it could be among the most vital of all flirting tips you hear.
Tease Her When She “Tests” You
Okay, so now that you know how boring it is for a woman when you act predictably by doing the things she wants, you might be wondering then why women try to control men. The standard answer here is that she is testing you to see whether you will be assertive or fold. Most men will fail these tests and reserve themselves a seat in the Friend Zone, but not you!
It’s easy to tell when a woman is testing you by the unreasonable nature of her request. The best way to “pass” these tests is to tease her in a playful way for being silly or difficult. Something like “You think you’re Paris Hilton or something?” or “You’re like my bratty little sister” work well. Doing this automatically puts you head and shoulders above 90% of the male population who are too afraid to make a stand in case they offend her.
Teasing brings excitement into your interaction with women and makes you appear confident and high-status by putting her straight in a fun way when she steps out of line.
For example you could also say, “You know if you weren’t so cute, I’d ditch you for saying that.” Notice how you’re able to pay a compliment that expresses your sexual interest in her without it coming across as needy because it’s packaged in a lighthearted tease.
Teasing is a very quick and easy way to generate attraction and can be pulled off successfully with a smile or a poker face. Often dropping even one tease into an otherwise normal and boring conversation will spark attraction and interest from a woman. You can tease girls about all sorts of things, including: a cute mannerism, her indecisiveness, her fishing for compliments, her girly conversation topics etc.
For example, if an attractive girl asks if her jeans make her bum look fat, instead of the predictable nice guy response, you could build attraction by responding in an outraged tone, “You’re talking about physical flaws already? What’s wrong with you? Don’t you know that if we’re ever going to get this relationship off the ground, you need to be mysterious and seductive?”
Make Assumptions and Funny Guesses
One great way to spark engaging, fun and personal conversation that’s overlooked by most guys, is to take guesses about her instead of asking questions directly. So instead of asking where she’s from, tell her that she looks half German or that she looks like a naughty Californian girl.
This is fun for women because even if your guesses are way off the mark, girls love knowing the impression that they make on people and it opens a lot of opportunity for personal conversation. Also if you do happen to guess right, she’ll be impressed by your insightfulness.
An unlikely assumption is just as fun, so if you see a girl sitting on her own in Starbucks how about saying something like this, “Okay so you’re waiting to meet a guy called Barry, who you met online. You don’t really know what he looks like, but he’ll wear a bright pink shirt and matching socks.”
This is a surprising, fun and non-threatening way to start a conversation with a girl. She’ll most likely laugh and then tell you what she’s really up to, or even better she’ll play along and the two of you will enjoy a fun and flirty conversation together. It might sound silly, but making assumptions is a great way to get a girl smiling and demonstrate that you’re a daring, different and fun kind of guy.
So the next time you feel tempted to ask a girl a question, try guessing the answer instead or just make up your own imaginary scenario about why she’s in town, what she does for a living, where she knows her friend from etc. (You’ll probably also enjoy this article about flirtatious and funny conversation starters.)
How to meet, date and attract beautiful girls
even if you’re not naturally good with women!
Click Here for my Free Seduction eCourse
Create an Emotional Connection
As you know making fun conversation is a great way to flirt with a girl, but if you want things to get sexual, then at some stage you’ll need to create an emotional connection. To do this you’re advised to avoid controversial, boring or depressing topics like religion, politics, violence, bad past relationships and other negative stuff.
Instead talk about positive things that evoke feeling and excitement. Find out her passions and interests, her dreams and goals, the best things that have happened to her or her childhood memories and connect with her on these things. Here are a few questions you could try courtesy of Richard La Ruina’s great book The Natural:
- What talents do you have that would surprise me? (To discover her passions and hidden talents.)
- If you could wake up tomorrow anywhere in the world, where would it be? (An interesting way of finding out if she’s adventurous and shares your interest in travel.)
- What is the one thing you can’t say no to? (A fun question to discover her vices and biggest temptations in life.)
- What was it like growing up in (her home town or country)? (You’ll learn interesting things about her background and get to know her better.)
- Do you remember your first day at school? (This can lead to the two of you exchanging lots of other stories.)
While women love a man with a great sense of humor, they also want a man with some depth and who can make interesting conversation. Questions like these will allow you to have deeper conversations and find out more about her as a person, while making her feel understood, unique and special.
Remember that women enjoy sex as much as men do, but they’re under a lot of social pressure to avoid being labeled easy or slutty. Whether a girl decides to sleep with you or not has less to do with the number of hours or dates spent together than it does about how convinced she is that you really like her or care about her.
This is why establishing an emotional connection is so important because it lets her know that you see her as more than purely a sexual exploit. And when do sleep together, you can expect the sex to be that much better.
Challenge Her and Be Selective
Beautiful women are used to getting their way with men and having the power of choice. A great flirting tip that turns the table on attractive girls is to issue them with challenges in order to win your affections. This demonstrates high status because it shows that you’re selective and looking for someone with more than just good looks.
Saying something like “If everyone looked the same, how would you stand out?” tells her that you’re not easily impressed by looks alone, it suggests that you’re picky when it comes to your taste in women and establishes you as the selector. You could go even further by asking if she’s rich or whether she can cook.
In the same way, saying “I’m not sure a young girl like you would know how to satisfy a mature man like me” issues her with a challenge that will make her feel compelled to prove her value by qualifying herself to you.
Don’t be afraid to challenge women by questioning their suitability for you because it’ll make you stand out from the all the other guys who are happy to be passively selected. Challenging women uses playful reverse psychology and is a very powerful flirting technique.
I hope you found these flirting tips helpful and they’ve given you some new ideas of ways to flirt with a girl. Use these flirting techniques the next time you’re out and you’ll be amazed at the difference they can make to your dating life. To gauge your flirting success and to know when to go in for the kiss, you might find this article helpful on signs a girl likes you.
Remember that if you want to be intimate with a woman, then at some stage you have to stick your neck out and express your sexual interest. While these are very powerful flirting tips, at the end of the day the way you flirt is less important than the fact that you actually do it. Flirting is a social behavior that you’ll only get good at with practice. So get out there and get your flirt on!
Then check out my Seduction eCourse — It’s Free!