Nothing is more reassuring and confidence boosting for a woman than receiving a genuine compliment from a man. So today we’ll take a look at how to compliment a girl the right way.
Women absolutely love compliments because they make women feel valued and appreciated. You shouldn’t be afraid to let a girl know what you like about her and what is special about her. Even beautiful women don’t have perfect confidence so don’t underestimate how important it is for women to be reminded of their positive attributes.
The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated. — William James
Why Some Guys Don’t Compliment Girls
Some guys don’t like complimenting girls because they feel that it “shows their hand” or demonstrates weakness, making them more vulnerable to rejection. Instead, they’d rather play games, pretending they’re not really that interested. This is not the approach I recommend.
Done right, giving compliments will not weaken your position. Perhaps ironically, when you put your balls on the chopping board by making it clear that you’re attracted to a woman, this communicates your masculinity and strength of character to her.
The Biggest Aphrodisiac is Someone Who Genuinely Likes You
Remember, the biggest aphrodisiac in the world is someone who is genuinely attracted to you. The fact is that women are turned on by being wanted and desired.
This means that a sincere compliment that demonstrates your desire for her can inspire a women to become more attracted to you and more highly invested in her relationship with you. Not only that, but she’ll also be encouraged to keep taking care of her appearance in order to keep you attracted.
And it makes sense. Just think about how often you’ve felt negatively towards someone, but changed your mind about them when they said something positive about you. The fact is that women love a guy who is man enough to be open about his feelings.
And don’t forget that all women, no matter how confident they appear, want to hear that they look sexy and beautiful. It’s a mistake to try to set yourself apart from other guys by not telling a woman what you like best about her.
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Only Authentic Compliments Count
So compliments are important, but it’s better to keep your mouth shut than to give a woman a compliment that’s not genuine. If you don’t believe what you’re saying, she’ll know.
Women come with built-in bullshit detectors and can always tell the difference between a genuine and a manipulative or an ass-kissing compliment, said with the intention of getting her into bed.
The main reason why many pick-up artists teach guys not to compliment girls is because a lot of guys have a tendency to pay too many compliments. This comes across as inauthentic and needy and makes a woman feel uncomfortable and objectified.
One of the biggest attraction killers is when a guy makes a love declaration to a woman he barely knows. This is not flattering and will only make you look desperate so please resist the temptation, no matter how strong the urge.
Expect Nothing in Return for a Compliment
Beautiful women are complimented on their looks often, and most of these compliments are given out of neediness. A confident man expresses his interest unconditionally, expecting nothing in return. When a true compliment comes from a man seeking nothing in return, it is much more powerful.
Your compliment should be a genuine, no-strings attached appreciation of something about her.
What I’m saying here is just because you compliment a girl, it doesn’t mean she owes you anything in return. Don’t think you can go trading compliments for sexual favors. Some guys think that just because they buy a girl a drink or say something nice to her, that she is morally obligated to sleep with them. Sorry, but it doesn’t work that way.
Some Good Compliments for Girls
Here are some good tips for complimenting women:
- The best compliments don’t have to be contrived or clever. If you’re not used to paying compliments, stick to something simple. “Hey, you look great” works perfectly well. If you love her smile, look her deep in her eyes and say, “You have a beautiful smile”. It really doesn’t have to be more complicated than that.
- You can make your compliment more potent by saying her name, “Rachel, you look stunning.”
- A woman will always appreciate a compliment that are actually about her, such as how interesting she is, how good she makes you feel, how much fun she is to be around, and so on. These type of compliments are more meaningful than a compliment about an item of clothing or accessory.
- Here’s a good compliment opener: “I really like the way you…”
- Complimenting a women’s character is a great way to make her feel good, but of course she also wants to hear that she is attractive. If you see that a woman has made an effort with or a change to her appearance, complimenting her specifically on this works more effectively than more general compliments. For example, “You’ve had your hair done. It looks great.”
- When you see a woman on a regular basis, remember that she’ll appreciate being reminded of the things that you like about her from time to time. That said, you should avoid paying the same compliment in the same way or it’ll lose effectiveness. Mix it up a little. Instead of saying “You look great” you could say “You look very elegant”, “You look stunning”, “You look dazzling”, etc.
All guys naturally know how to compliment a woman well, but we often keep the best compliments to ourselves instead of giving them away. If you feel awkward about complimenting girls, you can practice giving compliments to friends. They’ll know you have no hidden agenda, and they’ll appreciate the gesture.
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Ensuring Your Compliments Are Appreciated
Compliments are very powerful considering how easy they are to give, but that also means that you should give them wisely.
- Don’t overdo it. Avoid making more than one or two compliments per meeting. Any more and you’ll risk being seen as pandering. Remember that the more you praise someone, the less weight it carries.
- Believability is of utmost importance so you have to keep compliments sincere. When you compliment a girl, avoid making comedy facial expressions because you don’t want to come across as dishonest, sarcastic, or ironic.
- Don’t be too quick to smile and give praise when it’s not earned. Your compliment will carry more weight if you display to her that you’re willing to disagree with her opinions, and are not afraid of being rejected by her.
- Don’t say “today” in your compliment. For example if you say, “You look beautiful today” you risk making her think that she doesn’t look good on most other days.
- Unless you’re already sleeping together, it’s safer to stay away from compliments about her boobs or bum.
- Also telling someone that she reminds you of an ex is not a compliment, no matter how hot your ex was!
How to Accept a Compliment Graciously
Learning to accept compliments graciously is almost as important as learning to pay compliments. Compliments can make shy guys feel uncomfortable so they often respond by ignoring or rejecting well-intentioned compliments.
If you ignore a compliment, disagree with it, or get overly embarrassed when a woman pays you a compliment, she is unlikely to pay you another. You may even embarrass her in the process.
A simple “Thank you” or “Thanks, that was nice of you to say” accompanied by eye contact and a smile, is sufficient to accept a compliment.
Even beautiful women don’t have perfect confidence and will appreciate being complimented. So make a habit to open your mouth and let your positive thoughts be heard. It’ll make her feel good about herself and will make you a more charming and attractive man.
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