A lot of guys ask, “Does online dating work?” and “Is online dating worth it?” Despite it’s popularity, online dating is still a daring step for guys used to more traditional ways of meeting women. But just because other ways of meeting women are more established, it doesn’t automatically make them better.
Let’s compare online dating with some common places where guys meet girls to find out if online dating is worth it…
Bars and Clubs
How many happy couples do you know who met in a bar? Probably surprisingly few. While you might get your tongue down the throat of a girl who has had a few too many drinks, your chances of meeting “the one” when you’re out on the town is not high.
Bars and clubs can be surprisingly inefficient places to meet girls considering the time, energy and expense invested. Also the best bar hopping happens late at night, which limits the number of consecutive days you can go out without becoming sleep deprived. Waking up with a hangover also means the day after is often wasted.
Standing in a bar alone is uncomfortable so girls almost always go out in groups. This means that even if you pluck the necessary courage to approach a girl, it’s difficult to engage in intimate conversation with her away from her friends and the loud, dark and smoky atmosphere doesn’t help. Social conditioning is another significant hurdle because girls are worried about appearing “too easy” in front of their peers.
Of course there are a lot of girls out at bars and clubs, but the highest quality women don’t necessarily regularly hang out at crowded meat markets, where they are constantly hit on by drunk guys with cheesy pick up lines.
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The more familiar nature of house parties and being able to ask, “How do you know the host?” gives parties the edge over bars and clubs. Also if you like the host of the party, there is a good chance that you’ll gel well with his friends too.
The question though is how often are you invited out to parties? And even if you do go to a lot of parties, unless you’re very good looking, bold, or smooth, picking someone up in a few hours at a party is not always the easiest thing to do. Also if you get a reputation for hitting on all the girls at the party, you may spoil your chances of being invited again.
Do you have hot eye candy in the office? While an office affair sure can bring some excitement into the workplace and could even lead to a long term relationship, breaking up with a co-worker will ruin what minimal enjoyment you may have previously had on the job. Many guys would probably rather be unemployed than work in the same office as their ex. That’s without even considering the risk of sexual harassment and lawsuits.
It’s a shame really because work can be a great place to get to know someone, see how they interact with other people and even how they cope under pressure. There aren’t many places where you have so many opportunities to observe and consider a potential date. Still it’s a risky one, so don’t say you weren’t warned. Before diving into a work romance, ask yourself if you’re okay with the idea of looking for a new job if things don’t work out.
Particularly in summer you’ll notice enough beautiful girls out and about to make a grown man salivate. They’re out shopping, sipping iced frappuccinos, grabbing a bite to eat, sunning themselves at the pool, working out at the gym, taking strolls in parks etc. Unfortunately random encounters with women you meet while out on errands or going about your daily business demand the most skill.
Unless you have balls of steel, it’s not easy to hit on a girl in the middle of the day. It’s also hard to tell who is available so even if you do strike up a great conversation you’re not guaranteed a phone number, let alone a hot date. You could increase your chances by hanging out more at coffee shops and other places that tend to attract women, but if you work your time is fairly limited and you probably need to use those hours more productively.
If you think you need to be smooth to get a girls number in a bar, then try this at church under the watchful eye of aunt Mary and Father Ted. If you do get together with a girl at church be prepared for your relationship to be the source of lively gossip for the rest of the congregation. Also similar to meeting girls at work, if things don’t work out remember that you’ll have to see the person regularly at church in the future.
If you’ve been visiting your church for a long time, you may already know all the girls there or perhaps you’ve already been on a date with the few who you find somewhat attractive. If your goal is a long term relationship, church can help you to find girls with a good upbringing and moral compass, but it’s not be the best place to find a girl who’s up for a bit of fun in the bedroom if that’s important to you. Ask yourself: what would Jesus do? I’m guessing he’d enjoy the advantages of online dating too.
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Holidays and Cruise Ships
Holidays are expensive and if you work, they are few and far between. Some destinations do attract a large singles crowd looking for a party and these vacations are usually pricey and carry no guarantees of meeting that someone special, but at least you’ll get a tan.
If you’re considering trying your luck meeting singles on a cruise ship, bare in mind that few cruises are specifically designed for singles. It’s important to find out the expected age distribution before you go. Don’t forget the price tag, either. You’ll have to pay a hefty price tag for a private room if you want some private time with a new-found friend.
Holidays are great for holiday romances, but looking for dates out of town increases the chance of becoming involved in a long distance relationship, which can be hard to sustain.
Blind Dates and Arranged Marriage
There is enough pressure going out on a date with someone you’ve chosen, you don’t need the extra awkwardness of having to explain to your friends who are trying to hook you up why sweet Susan wasn’t right for you. I’m sure you’d prefer to pick your own losers, wouldn’t you?
Arranged marriage is a bit old-fashioned, perhaps, but removing the element of choice definitely makes dating a whole lot easier. Big plus. However a quick show of hands reveals that most folks trust their own flawed dating instincts more than their parents’ flawed dating instincts.
So, How Does Online Dating Compare…
It’s not impossible to meet girls without resorting to online dating and this post about where to meet girls will give you some ideas, but online dating is easier, cheaper and more stress free than many of the alternatives. For the same fifty bucks you might blow at a bar on a Saturday night approaching no one, you could pay for a membership, start emailing girls and arrange a bunch of hot dates for next week. Believe the hype: online dating works!
Online dating works because the approach is easier, the rejection is easier, and the success rate is higher. Remember that everyone on these sites is single and actively seeking, not like when you’re out at a bar where many women are just out to have fun with their friends.
In the past I would get into a relationship and then get to know the person I was dating. Now I get to know the person before I start dating them.
Perhaps biggest advantage of online dating is that you get to know your date before you meet her so you have more to talk about when you meet. It happens all the time that guys meet somebody at a bar, get a phone number and a kiss, and then start learning about each other during their first date. Online dating gives you the opportunity to screen someone for compatibility before you date them. This can save you a lot of time and hassle.
Also romance isn’t confined to the weekends anymore because now you can reach out to someone 24/7. Online dating has become far too mainstream to ignore and is the leading paid content category in the Internet. So get over it. Everybody is doing it and you’ll be amazed by the quality of the women in the Internet dating world. So whether you’re looking for a great date, a “meaningful, overnight relationship” or “the one”, online dating is a great place to look.
So does online dating really work and is online dating worth it? You’d better believe it and you’d be crazy not to give it a try!
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